Why do people think they can say mean things, and then take it back? Don’t they know there are things that can never be taken back?
I have never said anything to anyone that I didn’t mean fully. I guess I learned that practice from my mother. She would say mean things, and I couldn’t understand it at the time. When you are 10 years old, it’s hard to understand why the adult in your life is losing control. She is a great mom. I love her deeply. And I don’t blame her for anything. I’m just stating facts here. She did the best she could with the information she was given. She taught me to only say what you mean, and that you can’t take anything back. Be careful with your words. I love and care deeply for my friends. I would never speak to them the way that some people speak to me that ‘claim to be my friend’. To me, that is not a friend, and it never, ever was. It never will be. It’s just not ‘how I roll’.
However, it taught me a great, great lesson. Say only what you mean. And see things for what they are. When someone gets emotional with me, even if they say they only said things because they were hurt…………….. the bottom line is, that is really how they felt. That was their true bottom line feelings. So, if they call me names, and they say I am this or that…………… they meant it. Even if they said it out of extreme hurt. Even if they felt I personally did them wrong. Even if they were attempting to say it just to hurt me. It’s still real. It’s the bottom line, the true color, the real deal. You can’t just turn around and take it back. Especially if it was written in email. Email is logged and forever. If you are saying something just to hurt someone, you still thought it in your head………… and you MEANT IT!! No matter what. You can’t ‘take it back’. That is completely silly! If you were thinking it, and it came out in a moment of passion, you MEANT IT!
I had a guy awhile back that was a really young kid. He felt he was some sort of ‘Hitch’ character. An actor in Los Angeles of self importance. He thought he could drop a couple of quick lines, and play ‘the game’ with me, and I would swoon at the first chance to be with him. I’ve been in porn for over 10 years…………… I’ve seen every ‘game’ there is. That may work on 18 year olds, but, I started in the bars at a VERY young age! It simply won’t work with me. And my biggest discovery on the internet is, if you wait…………… the true colors do come out. I told him in the nicest terms possible that I wasn’t interested. To me, he was like a rat in a maze, trying to find his way to my pussy. When his ‘game’ didn’t work………….. he wrote some VERY, VERY mean things in an email. SERIOUSLY THE WRONG MOVE!!! That will never work, and if you think the person on the other end of your email isn’t real…………….. you are so completely wrong!
The bottom line is this. If you don’t mean it, don’t say it. And don’t try to ‘take it back’. You’ve already released it into the ‘airways’. It’s already out there swirling around in someone’s mind. What is that saying? “Too little too late”. Cut your losses and move on. When “Hitch’ did that to me, I blocked him in every way. And I block ANYONE that does that to me. What is the point in continuing communication? Obviously, they think differently. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with different thinking. I encourage that! But, I will never spend the time arguing to convince someone of my point of view. Free will. Free Will. Free Will. Move on, and find someone else that will validate your point of view. I won’t. It doesn’t mean I hate you, or don’t care about you. I just won’t succumb to your abuse. I’ve learned that lesson, and I don’t need to revisit it. But, I will thank you greatly in your participation in my continued learning.
Ok……………. I know what you are thinking………….. where is the porn???? The set this week is hot, hot, hot! (I had to make sure of that, considering you listened to the ramblings of my mind!)
As always, click the photo to view the whole set!! I thought a ‘jail’ set would be appropriate, for those that feel like victims, and those that feel that they are the ‘jailers’ or tyrants.

XOXO
Jax